tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-85702732929011050712024-02-20T09:02:31.264-06:00omg mn twinsKarleehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00852949713984615780noreply@blogger.comBlogger207125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8570273292901105071.post-10159147102500158732011-11-16T19:19:00.002-06:002011-11-16T19:35:36.191-06:00Its Aliiiiiiiiiiiiiiive!Hello world, I know its been a while since I've been on this here Twins blog but Karlee didn't have a computer. But now she does. So here's a list of things I should've talked about while I was away.<br /><br /><br />- First and foremost, Nick Punto won the World Series. Yes, him and only him. <br /><br />- I still find Kevin Slowey awkwardly attractive. So...so...so awkwardly attractive.<br /><br />- I found out I really like Brett Gardner, feel for me. <br /><br />- Jamey Carroll looks weird, but I'm kind of okay with signing him. Even though he tossed that ring into the lava at Mordor...or whatever. <br /><br />- AJ Pierzynski is a very awesome person. I want to rally drink with him so hard.<br /><br />- CJ Wilson is the complete opposite of a hipster, fact. Do hipsters like racing? Fuck no. Are hipsters straight edge? HELL NO, we like drinking box wine, and bitching about how we liked Ryan Gosling when he was in Young Hercules WAY BEFORE ANYONE ELSE. What can I say bowl cuts turn me on. <br /><br />- Brian Wilson tries too hard, but he makes trying too hard look very very good.<br /><br />- Terry Ryan is back, remember him? He wasn't all that great but hey I'll choose him over Bill Smith. He got rid of Nick Punto, he'll forever be on my shit list. I yelled out "WHY!" to Bill Smith when I saw him in person and oh boy golly he sure knew what the fuck I meant by that. <br /><br />- The Twins aren't good at baseball. But Glen Perkins is, he's fucking fabulous at it. <br /><br />- The Miami Marlins new logo makes me feel confused. Should I like all the pretty colors? Should I hate the fact it looks like something I would've made in MS Paint in 8th grade? Should I too take my talents to South Beach? Should I punch Logan Morrison in the cash and prizes? Do I automatically love this team based on the fact Ozzie Guillen is the skippah? <br /><br />- Oh, yeah....did I mention Nick Punto has a World Series Ring? Soak that in for a moment. <br /><br />- Cuddyer should stick to his day job. <br /><br />- Ben Revere should do stand-up and open up for Kevin Heart. So much shortness. So much cuteness. So much sass. <br /><br />- I want to go all Black Ops on an XXXXXXXXL Chalupa. Fact.<br /><br />- WRITTTEENNN IN THE STAAAAAARS, A MILLION MILES AWAAAAAAAAAAAAY.<br /><br />- I miss baseball.Karleehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00852949713984615780noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8570273292901105071.post-48698195469042950632011-05-26T21:27:00.014-05:002011-05-27T00:12:20.633-05:00Hipster Kevin SloweyLately I've been looking at Memes, if you have no clue what those are google it and embrace the funny. After all of this mumbo jumbo about Kevin Slowey and the drama thats taken place and how terrible they're (front office, not Kevin) handling all of this, I decided to make memes of him. <br /><br />NOTE: I adore this kid to pieces. These Memes are all in good fun. I hope you'll appreciate the sass. I wish one day something will make a meme of me. I'd be honored. <br /><br />I now give you, Hipster Slowey. <br />(Big thanks to <a href="http://www.twitter.com/twikipedium">twikipedium </a> for the pic!)<br /><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj2uwiltgg0nWaL6mtTlvzc1IJybf1gl0r1IfapjhJHhLr29_1zhXb0mewmDuUy30ebG2X32SfYlc7bq7DYfs-pMUCEAYgZ9kUF19zrY5EF5caHaq9_9CeylUWiJku7pKT62iVahyHw6yHS/s1600/k8.png"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj2uwiltgg0nWaL6mtTlvzc1IJybf1gl0r1IfapjhJHhLr29_1zhXb0mewmDuUy30ebG2X32SfYlc7bq7DYfs-pMUCEAYgZ9kUF19zrY5EF5caHaq9_9CeylUWiJku7pKT62iVahyHw6yHS/s320/k8.png" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5611224544555172530" /></a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgDMSulFlCPuDLXnJrmnoYkoGAjWdKHgufcYZY4FRmvRjNgaihH0tZ5-tk3SexvvC_KJYbQ-MlLTcGbrSY9y-i1Za5IcsziNbF4MS6XmsjY_U3Mybpit8aelgkXaiv772YTKl665HnXC_A5/s1600/k7.png"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgDMSulFlCPuDLXnJrmnoYkoGAjWdKHgufcYZY4FRmvRjNgaihH0tZ5-tk3SexvvC_KJYbQ-MlLTcGbrSY9y-i1Za5IcsziNbF4MS6XmsjY_U3Mybpit8aelgkXaiv772YTKl665HnXC_A5/s320/k7.png" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5611224459810453618" /></a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiDNUPoL7N6o-8rAs29XnyQxzcL6twkRNFo-TghiRP0UOgDdGTgoJcik1ufvkRvlWNAkiSoQKsl7ZOJtB_qv_K6JoXpIqv323Fu9CiSMry5aKx5VR4kT8W2LBxtDs9d-8itSM3Xpt8KuHIS/s1600/k6.png"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiDNUPoL7N6o-8rAs29XnyQxzcL6twkRNFo-TghiRP0UOgDdGTgoJcik1ufvkRvlWNAkiSoQKsl7ZOJtB_qv_K6JoXpIqv323Fu9CiSMry5aKx5VR4kT8W2LBxtDs9d-8itSM3Xpt8KuHIS/s320/k6.png" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5611224366800012418" /></a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhJVaIykAkVb0-ne7nVaACv-_6EG3S4Ce1z_Zezl9QfJBT70ks1fzSf0Ox7HhOUDWy7FDUxUgOM8_4CcMekxMJu1UGVlAeqmL98t7wFb_8evBCyHOfCf8C59qR97t6kol43CQMJIM7i3WNz/s1600/k5.png"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhJVaIykAkVb0-ne7nVaACv-_6EG3S4Ce1z_Zezl9QfJBT70ks1fzSf0Ox7HhOUDWy7FDUxUgOM8_4CcMekxMJu1UGVlAeqmL98t7wFb_8evBCyHOfCf8C59qR97t6kol43CQMJIM7i3WNz/s320/k5.png" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5611224276587869506" /></a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhF9DJXCmz8OWVPqBvK-Jf1ieh-HcjIMWFdIp_055Bv_I6u1MTwTG-oDsEc8MI_e-PQboi9uica3ELPRkV25kELDF1Jnba2Go4gDaZBfL9FK_bjWvFPHj3L_C7wnFzN8r5G2WLI5qWWP_d9/s1600/k4.png"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhF9DJXCmz8OWVPqBvK-Jf1ieh-HcjIMWFdIp_055Bv_I6u1MTwTG-oDsEc8MI_e-PQboi9uica3ELPRkV25kELDF1Jnba2Go4gDaZBfL9FK_bjWvFPHj3L_C7wnFzN8r5G2WLI5qWWP_d9/s320/k4.png" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5611224155171432546" /></a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgRPpAp-zdrhQm22tV4gEGkAkt_c4trV3j9Fyd1qQjptowSsHow2KoGf6jXrjozzMZy3MDRC1kxNwGCib1uwsSAtc009X3bq6BS3aJJj_f5DGbD_kedk61MqojISB9QWYqWCWCnBIDONC6v/s1600/k3.png"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgRPpAp-zdrhQm22tV4gEGkAkt_c4trV3j9Fyd1qQjptowSsHow2KoGf6jXrjozzMZy3MDRC1kxNwGCib1uwsSAtc009X3bq6BS3aJJj_f5DGbD_kedk61MqojISB9QWYqWCWCnBIDONC6v/s320/k3.png" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5611224077551097154" /></a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEitpLA7k2N41kTbqKAgPJ8Zgr3w694UIGzdbAoLVdPHcQrUEZrC6nCA2Oy55qMI-m6MFDg4K3FRDZY0nCzjYv2mblz4Jhj2sVMUfJzPmVLzgQ9sgaBNCqmjOm4-xRxJ_PLZI-iruTStOG-i/s1600/k2.png"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEitpLA7k2N41kTbqKAgPJ8Zgr3w694UIGzdbAoLVdPHcQrUEZrC6nCA2Oy55qMI-m6MFDg4K3FRDZY0nCzjYv2mblz4Jhj2sVMUfJzPmVLzgQ9sgaBNCqmjOm4-xRxJ_PLZI-iruTStOG-i/s320/k2.png" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5611223993403939234" /></a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiwTzBjBBOw3kutvHEgH1dwZp4_y2ZIvDd7vFjlz_WRm0qPQSl1jmSNwxzIKbbkrFd3dsz-ht1ybcAm5gyqYFt4kjTkccqH_jEPLgtYyqaEYC5LITOs84auiFAOIBk2GW-ExspXirpex2se/s1600/k1.png"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiwTzBjBBOw3kutvHEgH1dwZp4_y2ZIvDd7vFjlz_WRm0qPQSl1jmSNwxzIKbbkrFd3dsz-ht1ybcAm5gyqYFt4kjTkccqH_jEPLgtYyqaEYC5LITOs84auiFAOIBk2GW-ExspXirpex2se/s320/k1.png" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5611223901503038498" /></a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiDiCQl4jzsuQl7jkj4kklvXg4PZXFnEK8RZBB-CuGsu3vpP_u2kVuxo0XmbvL8fIhKdCzF0SGfSNVOQA6JX_yvO6tB3wSJ9hEliP3snzxjzXwvzCd2EcMwOtJcGw_-Y330TVeABe7iNF-p/s1600/KK9.png"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiDiCQl4jzsuQl7jkj4kklvXg4PZXFnEK8RZBB-CuGsu3vpP_u2kVuxo0XmbvL8fIhKdCzF0SGfSNVOQA6JX_yvO6tB3wSJ9hEliP3snzxjzXwvzCd2EcMwOtJcGw_-Y330TVeABe7iNF-p/s320/KK9.png" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5611254527058487986" /></a><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgEinDCiOF_MLL1yXvAF_-T_W2ufs6CezS2a0FFHXy48BcVWXp-da9s78oxCrAZdMEZiC_R6sDH4IB_2vsOcLZQfmWpRLujL6L7IFg-9d5YKbYxJhAYeX28Sa2pqabIRX2AFsrTlBDZFyNk/s1600/kk10.png"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgEinDCiOF_MLL1yXvAF_-T_W2ufs6CezS2a0FFHXy48BcVWXp-da9s78oxCrAZdMEZiC_R6sDH4IB_2vsOcLZQfmWpRLujL6L7IFg-9d5YKbYxJhAYeX28Sa2pqabIRX2AFsrTlBDZFyNk/s320/kk10.png" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5611258426613554098" /></a>Karleehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00852949713984615780noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8570273292901105071.post-54471318797318727982011-04-21T17:24:00.004-05:002011-04-21T17:31:22.015-05:00The Twins Have Died From DysenteryMy buddy Ben from That's Twins Baseball has a hashtag on Twitter thats a hoot, and that hashtag is: #TargetFieldTrail. It pretty much seems like our axels on our metaphorical wagon are falling off, and with everyone getting sick it's like "Martha got bit by a snake" or "Bill has Dysentery" in the Twins clubhouse as of late. Be sure to check out that hashtag for hilariousness, in other news...I decided to use my best skills in MS Paint. Enjoy.<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEifokQbYLJppiBYQldqbrW8Qb-jRNPDn_cuUDwNGOxW7tXw84VTkLZkDMnVJ8U7gOaZHzdqJ9yi1autq_1xZnuSIvSPfiJrQGdEmj8epADoWpG85Z0jwQFoZJh1o22Qa8e07XAHB7wjmuFD/s1600/Untitled.jpg"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 216px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEifokQbYLJppiBYQldqbrW8Qb-jRNPDn_cuUDwNGOxW7tXw84VTkLZkDMnVJ8U7gOaZHzdqJ9yi1autq_1xZnuSIvSPfiJrQGdEmj8epADoWpG85Z0jwQFoZJh1o22Qa8e07XAHB7wjmuFD/s320/Untitled.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5598167403051032402" /></a><br /><br />Make sure to follow Ben @Bennyc50 and me @KarleeKanz for more Twins hilariousness.Karleehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00852949713984615780noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8570273292901105071.post-36249853117243552322011-04-05T23:30:00.003-05:002011-04-05T23:40:09.917-05:00Why Didn't Chewbacca Get a Medal?That thought popped up into my head after seeing the Twins beat the Yankees at Yankee Stadium tonight, five to four. <br /><br />Why do you ask? Because we finally beat the Evil Empire. We are Chewbacca in this situation. They didn't get a medal because they had to do what needed to be done. Just like Chewy did, he doesn't need a medal to show people what he's done. He just did what he thought he should have done. Am I confusing you yet?<br /><br />Or maybe Chewbacca didn't get a medal because the rebel alliance is run by a bunch of rabid anti-Wookite bigots. I could possibly be referring to umpires but it would make no sense, right?<br /><br />Medal= Joe Mauer's fair ball during the play-offs. <br />Rebel Alliance= Umpires<br />Chewbacca= Minnesota Twins<br />Karlee= Opening up old wounds<br /><br />You're welcome.Karleehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00852949713984615780noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8570273292901105071.post-130831941274353642011-01-17T14:06:00.002-06:002011-01-17T15:29:14.032-06:00May the Power of Bill Smith Compel YouI just had a visual of Ron Gardenhire dressed up like a priest, holding down Carl Pavano screaming "May the power of Bill Smith compel you!" over and over until the "wanting to go to other teams" demons leave his body. Being exercised makes him realize his best choice is to sign with the Twins. Its already worked once with Jim Thome, but it'll be harder to shake out the demons inside of Pavano since he's played for the Yankees. As we all know they are indeed Satan's little helpers. This is why they win all the time. This doesn't mean being evil has its perks (it does) and you should never sell your soul to the devil, only if you REALLY need something (but really, never do that). <br /><br />As each day passes we get closer to Spring Training. Are you excited? I'm pretty stoked if I do say so myself. We had some good signings, some awkward trades and there are also some things to be done(like not trading Slowey so I won't flip my metaphorical shit) But the main thing is that we got good ol' Jimmy Jam back so he can mash his taters for the Minnesota Twins. I'd go and tell you the utter heartbreak that is Nick Punto being a free agent but we won't go there until its 100% sure that he isn't a Twin. I'm brain washing myself into thinking we'll sign him again. <br /><br /><br /><br />I'll be blogging more from now on since its getting that much closer. For now, Karlee out!Karleehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00852949713984615780noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8570273292901105071.post-67034184236749482372010-11-17T13:31:00.003-06:002010-11-17T13:53:05.410-06:00OMG, Finally!If you haven't heard by now, Minnesota Twins Manager Ron Gardenhire won Manager of The Year............FINALLY. <br /><br />Gardenhire has been runner up in 2003, 2004, 2006, 2008 and 2009. He is also the first manager to win six division titles in his first nine years with his team. Go Go Gadget Gardy! Now, if only he can get a bullpen that doesn't crumble or starters that can give up less than 5 hits a game(or go longer than 5 innings), or count on the power hitters hitting home runs in a stadium that is hard to hit home runs (so they say, tell that to Jim Thome or every other team that played us and got second deck home runs)<br /><br />Either way, the way he managed the team last year was damn near immaculate. Among all of the injuries and shenanigans I think he stood his ground and had great composure, unlike some other coach on a certain other Minnesota team. He just didn't win the MOY because of his wins (which is a good part of it though, naturally), he won because of the respect he gets and has for his team. It isn't all about winning, its also about heart and soul in which he has a gaggle ton of. <br /><br /><br />Now that Gardy has drug me out of the peripheral writing closet I'd like to shine some light on the whole Nick Punto thing that went down. <br /><br />I'm sad. Real sad. Real super duper uber sad. I know for a fact that he won't sign with us seeing that the Yankees, Red Sox, and Phillies had interest in him last year. I assumed they might not pick up his option then offer him something cheaper, but who knows.<br />Side Note: Might I ask you to take a look at those three team names I listed. Yeah, they're good teams aren't they? Why would they want a player who 'sucks', right? I'll let you think about that one. <br /><br />Once I know Nick Punto will officially be off of the team, I'll write a novel about all the memories. I know all of the fan(...s?) of him are looking forward to it. Also, I will follow him to any team and like that said team because he'd be on that said team. Yes. You read that correctly. ANY team. (Eventheyankeesimsosorry)Karleehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00852949713984615780noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8570273292901105071.post-53149418940653424432010-09-23T13:21:00.002-05:002010-09-23T13:25:50.004-05:00Don't Call Them TwinkiesLadies and Gentlemen may I present you with possibly the best baseball song,ever. Made by a Minnesotan at least.<br />Its by The Baseball Project and Craig Finn (of The Hold Steady)<br />Enjoy, may it ravish your ear drums. <br /><br /><br /><br /><script type="text/javascript" src="http://minnesota.publicradio.org/www_publicradio/tools/media_player/js/swfobject.js"></script><div id="minnesota_the_current_features_2010_09_22_baseball_project_dont_call_them_twinkies_20100922_128s_player"></div><script type="text/javascript">/*<![CDATA[*/var so = new SWFObject("http://minnesota.publicradio.org/www_publicradio/tools/media_player/s_player.swf", "minnesota_the_current_features_2010_09_22_baseball_project_dont_call_them_twinkies_20100922_128s_player", "319", "83", "8", "#ffffff");so.addParam("quality", "high");so.addParam("menu", "false");so.addParam("wmode", "transparent");so.addVariable("name", "minnesota/the_current/features/2010/09/22/baseball_project_dont_call_them_twinkies_20100922_128");so.write("minnesota_the_current_features_2010_09_22_baseball_project_dont_call_them_twinkies_20100922_128s_player");/*]]>*/</script>Karleehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00852949713984615780noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8570273292901105071.post-64423351221495904292010-09-18T02:00:00.003-05:002010-09-18T02:14:57.800-05:00Cat NamesIf you love the MN Twins and cats, this is the post for you.<br />I got bored. (insomnia= creativity time) so I thought of names for cats that sound like the players names.<br /><br /><br />Joe Meower.<br />Justin Meowneau.<br />Jason Mewbel. <br />Kevin Hissey (cause he is all the sassy)<br />J.J. Rawrdy.<br />Drew Mewtera.<br />Glen Prrrrrkins<br />Danny Meowlencia.<br />Jason Meowko.<br />Jeff Meowship.<br />Nick Mewto.<br />Ron Gardenmeower.<br />Cat Meowshek.<br />Taters. (Jim Thome)<br />Scratchy Baker. (mad cat)<br />Meowchael Cuddyer.<br />Ben Mreowvere.<br /><br /><br /><br />.......okay I really need to go to bed.Karleehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00852949713984615780noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8570273292901105071.post-26499247238091072482010-09-09T16:34:00.002-05:002010-09-09T16:39:34.483-05:00Mister IncredibleHere is another one of my 2 minute craptastic paint creations.<br /><br /><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhOBEEJ4sl-eUCLfROiS8T6FCMGArjQ3ouzq4MN33AnyFMXDCjzeGiddQfQRwWQtLUX_9iMRORZ_fW9Xi-pV8a6kMGUq17J4lhG1j-tTIZ0PUSjniXMIUXW214GHNpOOOSwpm3glLCnk8Ms/s1600/thome.jpg"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 268px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhOBEEJ4sl-eUCLfROiS8T6FCMGArjQ3ouzq4MN33AnyFMXDCjzeGiddQfQRwWQtLUX_9iMRORZ_fW9Xi-pV8a6kMGUq17J4lhG1j-tTIZ0PUSjniXMIUXW214GHNpOOOSwpm3glLCnk8Ms/s320/thome.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5515030611428293506" /></a><br /><br /><br />After watching The Incredibles on DVD for the 4th time today (thanks to a 3 year old) I realized Jim Thome looks just like the dad. Or maybe I'm losing it? But either way, we all can agree on one thing. Jim Thome is Incredible.Karleehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00852949713984615780noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8570273292901105071.post-32285863862227273222010-09-08T13:34:00.003-05:002010-09-16T16:58:24.297-05:00Jim Thome FactsYou've guys been waiting, and here is a hot fresh batch of Jim Thome Facts for your consumption. I edited some Chuck Norris facts into Jim Thome facts. The other half are made by yours truly. Enjoy!<br /><br /><br />JIM THOME FACTS.<br /><br />- Jim Thome doesn't do push up's. He pushes the world down.<br /><br />- Jim Thome's first word was 'taters'<br /><br />- Before Chuck Norris goes to sleep, he checks in his closet and under his bed for Jim Thome.<br /><br />- Jim Thome's hotness is the cause of global warming. <br /><br />- Al Gore hates Jim Thome.<br /><br />- Jim Thome can play Wii bowling without moving. He just stares down the pins until they all fall down.<br /><br />- When Jim Thome plays Oregon Trail his family doesn't die from dysentry, but rather 380 foot moon shots to the face.<br /><br />- If Jim Thome was in the movie 300 they would of had to change the name to 1.<br /><br />- Jim Thome is the square root of a negative number.<br /><br />- The force is strong in Luke Skywalker. But Jim Thome is strong with the force.<br /><br />- In the show 'LOST' Jim Thome IS the island.<br /><br />- When quoting Jim Thome you must type in all caps.<br /><br />- When Jim Thome walks in the woods, you'd think the wind is making the trees move. Nay, it is the trees trembling at the thought they could possibly be his next bat.<br /><br />- Jim Thome ate Gilbert Grape<br /><br />- Jim Thome's singing voice is a mixture between Fergie and Jesus.<br /><br />- The only reason the devil went down to Georgia is because Jim Thome would never go to Georgia, so therefore it is the only safe zone for him to go.<br /><br />- When Jim Thome is thirsty he quenches his thirst with a mixture of Ozzie Guillen's tears and pine tar.<br /><br />- Jim Thome is the reason why the Dead Sea is dead.<br /><br />- Jim Thome can solve a rubix cube just by staring at it.<br /><br />- Jim Thome can touch MC Hammer<br /><br />- Jim Thome never wet his bed. His bed wet itself in fear.<br /><br />- There is no escape button on Jim Thome's keyboard because Jim Thome escapes from NOTHING.<br /><br />- Pluto was dubbed not a planet after scientists realized it was only a baseball hit by Jim Thome.<br /><br />- Jim Thome's home run balls are all collected in one place. The Kuiper belt.<br /><br />- If you are wise, you would never attempt to 'poke' Jim Thome on facebook.<br /><br />- Jim Thome is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right arms.<br /><br />- Jim Thome knows where in the world Carmen Sandiego is. <br /><br />- Some baseball players chew gum, Jim Thome chews tungsten carbide. <br /><br />- Jim Thome knows what Willis is talking about.<br /><br />- Jim Thome can slam a revolving door.<br /><br />- Death once had a near Jim Thome Experience.<br /><br />- Jim Thome is the reason why Waldo is hiding.<br /><br />- Jim Thome doesn't have a Twitter because he's already following you.<br /><br />- Jim Thome doesn't have a facebook because he doesn't have friends. He just knows people who are worthy enough to not have a line drive home run hit in their general direction. <br /><br />- When Jim Thome takes a bath he doesn't get clean the water gets dirty.<br /><br />- Jim Thome has the power to order a McRib at McDonalds anytime of the year and get one.<br /><br />- Who needs Jimmy Johns? Jim Thome is freaky faster and freaky gooder.<br /><br />- Jim Thome doesn't run the bases slowly, your brain just can't process how fast he's actually going.<br /><br />- If Jim Thome points his bat at you, that is more than likely the last thing you'll see.<br /><br />- Jim Thome doesn't eat. He just mashes taters until hes had his fill. <br /><br />- In 'Enter The Dragon' it was actually Jim Thome who killed Chuck Norris.<br /><br />- The last digit in pi is Jim Thome. He ends all things. With his bat. <br /><br />- Champions are the breakfast of Jim Thome.<br /><br />- The only reason Jim Thome wears batting gloves is so his hotness doesn't set the bat on fire.<br /><br />- Brett Favre can throw a football over 60 yards. Jim Thome can throw Brett Favre even further.<br /><br />- When Jim Thome falls into water, he doesn't get wet. The water gets Jim Thome'd. <br /><br />- Jim Thome cuts down trees with his bat.<br /><br />- Jim Thome once played first base, then realized in real life and baseball, he goes all the way. This is how he turned into a DH.<br /><br />- When Jim Thome played little league he bunted a 500 foot home run.<br /><br />- Jim Thome went from crawling to mashing taters. Walking is overrated. <br /><br />- There is one thing faster than the speed of light, Jim Thome's swing.<br /><br />- Jim Thome has played up to level 81 in World of Warcraft. <br /><br />- Toyata Priuses never had a gas pedal problem. They were just all trying to speed away from Jim Thome.<br /><br />- Jim Thome doesn't compete. He wins.Karleehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00852949713984615780noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8570273292901105071.post-6803300849804996732010-09-03T23:04:00.002-05:002010-09-04T00:25:50.845-05:00Previously On LOSTWARNING: If you do not watch LOST you won't find this remotely hilarious. Well, maybe.<br /><br /><br />As you all noticed we added new pitcher to our Team. <br />No. Not Duensing.<br />No. Not Capps.<br />No. Not Flores.<br />No. Not Burnett.<br />No. Not Delaney.<br />No, not even Fuentes.<br /><br />I am speaking of the one and only, Matt Fox.<br />If you didn't know who I was talking about by the title of my blog post you;<br /><br />A: Don't watch TV<br />B: You live under a rock<br />C: You hate amazing TV<br />D: All of the above<br /><br />Quick run down.<br />Matthew Fox plays Jack Shephard on LOST. LOST is a TV show that has had its final season this year. It is amazing. The ending pissed me off. But that is a whole other blog post, this is about baseball (kind of) and thats it.<br /><br />Matt Fox has the same name as Matthew Fox (I really didn't need to point that out.)<br /><br />So it made me think, Matt Fox is obviously Jack Shephard on LOST if I had to pick who he'd be. But the million dollar question is, who would the rest be?<br /><br /><br />Joe Mauer: Vincent. Very approachable, friendly, hairy, loves his owner (his mother) and trustworthy. <br /><br />Joe Nathan: Charlie, when he was weening himself off of Heroine. Twitchy McGee.<br /><br />Kevin Slowey: For some reason, Ben Linus. Book smart, sarcastic, would do anything to help, even if its killing (striking out) people (players). Also, I bet he can rock those Harry Potter adult glasses like a BOSS.<br /><br />Scott Baker: Sun. Kind of timid and quiet, also listens very well but if need be she will break out and do something that surprises you. Or he'd be the hot mess that was on Jack's face when he proclaimed "We need to go back!!!" because have you seen that kids facial hair? I think its brilliant but you guys sing a different song. <br /><br />Delmon Young: Walt. Because lately I've been known to yell out his name. All those silly plays in the outfield. "waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaalt!/Delmooooooooooon!"<br /><br />Trevor Plouffe: Boone. Super attractive but isn't around long. Highly unfortunate.<br /><br />Nick Punto and Ron Gardenhire: Rose and Bernard. Do I even have to tell you why? Google it you non LOST watchers, then laugh in joyous rapture.<br /><br />Scotty Ullger: John Locke. You feel bad for him, he is always failing, but always tries to do better and do the right thing.........but fails.<br /><br />Francisco Liriano: Ana Lucia. Because he is a bad-ass. And she is quite the bad-ass herself.<br /><br />Denard Span: Mr.Eko. I'm sorry but his time on the island was almost as productive as you this year. He just pressed a button, and got killed by the smoke monster. Kind of sad.<br /><br />Brendan Harris: He is Male #2 in episode 13 in season 6. Ya know, the one who gets killed by the smoke monster? Moving on.<br /><br />TC: I'd simply say he was one of the Polar Bears but they get killed off right away and that is unfortunate (I know, Polar Bears on the island? Watch the show). So I'd say Hurley because he is big, snuggly, hairy and naturally the cheerleader/mascot of the island.<br /><br />Drew Butera: Daniel Faraday. He is adorable and smart. Did I mention adorable? Oh, and he was a huge help in the end. It just fits. But lets hope he doesn't get killed by his mother when he goes back in time. He is the new age Marty McFly. <br /><br />Danny Valencia: Its a tie, he is either the foot statue. For the longest time you didn't know a thing about him/the foot. You didn't know its potential. And then you find out there is hidden powers that dwell inside said foot. Or he's Richard Alpert. One word: EYELASHES.<br /><br />Jason Repko: Sawyer. He seems like he could wrestle a hog, yet in the same day open a door for a girl and treat her to a nice dinner. Then go get into a bar fight. Babe alert. <br /><br />John Rauch; The Smoke Monster. He scares me. Tikka tikka tikka! Yes, Rauch is a huge billowing and rolling mass of black smoke who kill people. <br /><br />Jesse Crain: Desmond Hume. Only because I think Desmond would also wear the same necklaces that Crain wears. Also, whenever I see Crain strike someone out I could hear him whisper "See you in another life, brotha"<br /><br /><br />Note: I am sorry for the other players I did not mention. I either forgot you or simply couldn't think of who you would be. YOU, my readers should add on to this, tell me who you really think Sawyer should be or just tell me how brilliant I am.Karleehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00852949713984615780noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8570273292901105071.post-41017994154419542012010-07-25T02:44:00.001-05:002010-07-25T02:44:08.679-05:00This Is How I See ItRemember this guy?<br /><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/wCX_XlRYYDo&hl=en_US&fs=1?color1=0x2b405b&color2=0x6b8ab6"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/wCX_XlRYYDo&hl=en_US&fs=1?color1=0x2b405b&color2=0x6b8ab6" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object><br /><br />I sure don't. All I see now is pure awesome (even though my immature side thinks him beaming the umpire with a bat is ALL the funny and pure awesome, but I'm a bitch). Someone showed me this video again today and I actually forgot that he did that, now THAT is how good he has been lately. <br /><br /><br /> Everyone says his awesomeness stems from his new swing and batting stance, and how he opens up on the ball easier. It HAS to be something more epic than that. Every game I watch he is getting RBI's, hitting home runs, and kicking ass and taking names. Yes he sometimes doesn't time the ball right in left field but this isn't about his offence right now. This is totally about his D. (Defense, you pervs)<br /><br /><br />I would go and say since he added me on facebook he has been on fire. But surely it isn't because of me (it could possibly be) because I'm not a gypsy (but a few people have told me I am one) <br /><br /><br />I do like his "Don't bring up how amazing I am being, I don't want to think about it, let me play and kick ass" mantra. It is helping him quite nicely if I do say so myself.<br /><br /><br />All in all I would just like to say, let Delmon be Delmon. He is exactly what I thought Denard Span would be this year, but isn't. Let him be amazing, don't ask what he is doing right because I bet he doesn't even know. <br /><br />Now watch this:<br /><br /><object width="400" height="250"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/1ez9xiDsSX4&hl=en_US&fs=1?color1=0x2b405b&color2=0x6b8ab6"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/1ez9xiDsSX4&hl=en_US&fs=1?color1=0x2b405b&color2=0x6b8ab6" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="400" height="250"></embed></object><br /><br />Imagine Chevy Chase dressed as...god know what is the MN Twins and the very attractive Joel McHale is the attractive Twins fans. And we all know who Delmon Young is in this video. Now, let that blanket of warmth and safety smother you into thinking we actually have a chance into winning the division this year.Karleehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00852949713984615780noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8570273292901105071.post-61381828366978434172010-07-06T12:56:00.003-05:002010-07-06T14:58:29.517-05:00Players vs ProspectsAs we all know the Twins sure do like their farm system. Many good players have been brought up from that system, including Joe Mauer. And last time I checked he is kind of a big deal. That <span style="font-style:italic;">is</span> Twins baseball. Wholesome primmed and picked players. They need to mix things up.<br /><br />It might sound like I am complaining, but I thought the Twins were FINALLY stepping out of their 'comfort zone' and starting to try new things out, with the additions of Orlando Hudson, J.J Hardy and Jim Thome. But now they are in a situation where they truly need help, and no prospect from the farm system will be able to fill that void. Unless we trade some prospects for a player. <br /><br />You wanna know who the MN Twins are? They are that greedy kid who played Pokemon and didn't want to trade any cards with you, even though you are giving them a real good deal. I mean who in their right mind wouldn't take the infamous banned "Birthday Pikachu" card? Cliff Lee is that Birthday Pikachu. <br /><br />Rumors of trading Wilson Ramos and Aaron Hicks for Cliff Lee are running rampant. Most Twins fans are in cahoots since both are very good top tier prospects. Who in their right mind would trade a catcher who is technically not really going to be used that much (Joe Mauer Joe Mauer Joe Mauer OMG Baby Jesus, ugh) who has great potential and would be of use to some other team and a decent outfielder for a Cy Young winner? I mean that IS crazy talk right? (warning: SARCASM ALERT) Giving two talented kids so they can have a chance to play in the Major Leagues? <br /><br />I think the Twins showed that they mean serious business getting Jim Thome. (he is player of the week with a .400 batting avg and 4 hrs) I always said we needed a dominating pitcher, something we don't really make in our farm system. Cliff Lee is our answer. <br /><br />MN Twins, just don't trade one of our starting pitchers for a pitcher. I've been hearing rumors about that too and let me tell you, that would be no bueno.Karleehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00852949713984615780noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8570273292901105071.post-88072617722174912952010-06-30T23:54:00.003-05:002010-07-01T00:37:58.479-05:00FactsHere are a couple things I have noticed/thought about over the past week of seeing the Twins play.<br /><br />- Bad pitching is contagious, kind of like a sneeze. <br /><br />- Good pitching is contagious, kind of like something less scary than a sneeze. Because really, they are pretty much mini panic attacks. Tiny jihadi attacks to your self being. <br /><br />- There ain't no party like a Nick Punto party because a Nick Punto party don't stop. After seeing him at the Major's at Major's thing, he can not only pick up his team on the field but really get people hammered. And put WAY too much eye black under my eyes.<br /><br />- That Delmon Young character is a good baseball player, don't chya know?<br /><br />- I am one leg on the 'get Cliff Lee omg!!!!1!!one' bandwagon. Everyone brings up trading Slowey or Blackburn, I personally think we don't need to trade a healthy starter for a two month rental. Not worth it. Get a couple triple-a and a couple double-a and lets call it a deal, am I right? <br /><br />-Also, we have been in a rut as of late pitching wise. It's not like they are going to stay like that for the rest of the year. Yes, we need one extra 'oomph' to be a contender if we make the play offs. But lets not dwell on that right now.<br /><br />-Minnesota Twins fans need to start enjoying baseball, and not stressing out over it. It's a past-time. Relax, watch these guys do what they love doing and cheer for them. And drink a ton of beer, eat hot dogs, and laugh when a girl says "Why are they boo'ing Kubel?" <br /><br />- I am louder than Orlando Hudson with one beer in me. <br /><br />- I started muting the TV for every other game and putting it on closed captioning because I need a break from Dick and Bert's old man shenanigans, ya know stating the obvious, talking about how pitchers should go 9 innings and 'that's an out in Oakland'. <br /><br />-I started playing The Weepies, The Blow, The Black Keys, and The National whilst watching baseball. I consider that a way-too-much-awesome-combination. But I can handle it. Add in some gummi bears and a huge bottle of smart water and I'm golden.<br />( side note: I like bands that start with "The" I guess)<br /><br />- Carl Pavano's mustache haunts me. Remember the Mario Brothers movie with Dennis Hopper in it? My dream was just that, but Pavano was a Mario Bro. Yes, Dennis Hopper was in it still. Why would I replace his bad-ass-ness?<br /><br />-I need to make business cards, because writing on the back of a UFC flyer is <span style="font-weight:bold;">not</span> classy. And I am a classy girl. <br /><br />- Seriously, STOP proposing at games guys. I mean yes, it's cute but not when it happens every day. Get a bit more creative. <br /><br />- Height wise, I come up to Rauch's part I shouldn't come up to. This makes for a very awkward picture taking experience. <br /><br /><br />-Oh look, I have a personal blog: <a href="http://www.cheeringupbuttercup.blogspot.com">Musings From An Amuser</a> <br />I don't think I've spoken once about baseball in it, yet. YES, I do have other things to talk about, shocker. I will be talking about my transfer from the city to the country, college, music I'll be making, music I enjoy, and other randomness in my awkward life.Karleehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00852949713984615780noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8570273292901105071.post-24397573924003658382010-06-14T17:05:00.002-05:002010-06-14T17:15:35.127-05:00UGH.Okay I've had it. I truly dislike our inept infield. J.J. Hardy and Orlando Hudson decided to go and ruin their wrists. I suggest they stop playing Wii right this instant. But I peg Hardy to be more of a Big Buck Hunter kind of guy. And Orlando Hudson? Don't even get me started, he is probably too busy watching Lifetime movies anyways.<br /><br />We have the lowest average of Avg's in the infield in all of MLB (last time I checked, at least. Yes even lower than the Pirates. Win.) You know it's a problem when Nick Punto has the best AVG out of all of them. Oh, also? The Drew Butera experiment should be concluded very soon me thinks. <br /><br /><br />I have been trying my hardest to actually stay positive but it's starting to become hard, with all the injuries and bullpen rockiness. But I am in utter shock that we are in first place. I don't know how we do it. And the thought of Span finally coming around, and if Cuddyer learned how to hit the ball and get runs in with people on base, and if Mauer started hitting line drives not directly at someone, our team would be unstoppable. <br /><br />Positives? Kubel is finally coming around. And Delmon Young decided to become a beastly clutch monster of epic proportions. <br /><br />Okay, I guess I still have faith. Today is a much needed day off, not just for them but for us Twins fans. Usually we are amazing versus the National League. Let's keep that trend going.Karleehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00852949713984615780noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8570273292901105071.post-86108141563198970412010-05-26T03:36:00.010-05:002010-06-14T18:56:59.669-05:00Target Field Squirrel, Friend Or Foe?<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEizd_s_J1h8Q_4R7mvu0Ow5dkgwrzrPjN8xLolE4Y1jVr6fZZo2rSouTMFh-e5WThSX1ftU5FFo5rSHOgqVVaq4LA4p6JOMhgvGEcaY7sLGKdF_skhFq8g2nfF5hRzErlqHAloxQYEoIGzB/s1600/kjhgfdfghjg.jpg"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 185px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEizd_s_J1h8Q_4R7mvu0Ow5dkgwrzrPjN8xLolE4Y1jVr6fZZo2rSouTMFh-e5WThSX1ftU5FFo5rSHOgqVVaq4LA4p6JOMhgvGEcaY7sLGKdF_skhFq8g2nfF5hRzErlqHAloxQYEoIGzB/s320/kjhgfdfghjg.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5475497055522963730" /></a><br />I was at the opening game of the Twins VS Yankees series. And like the other people in the stadium I was in cahoots over that cute adorable little squirrel. You all have taken a liking to him, kind of like Kirby the Kestrel. If you haven't seen the video of him traipsing around, have a looksie:<br /><br /><br /><object width="360" height="140"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/TanzQ--Ri6s&hl=en_US&fs=1&color1=0x2b405b&color2=0x6b8ab6"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/TanzQ--Ri6s&hl=en_US&fs=1&color1=0x2b405b&color2=0x6b8ab6" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="360" height="140"></embed></object><br /><br />Awwwww, isn't he cute? But I watched him slyly sneak against the outfield wall and then all a sudden he disappeared, I assumed he went into the bullpen when one of the Yankees pitchers opened the door. <br /><br />Then.<br />GASP.<br />I'VE SEEN HIM BEFORE. That furry bastard!<br /><object width="325" height="244"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/MPWaL-B1tl4&hl=en_US&fs=1&color1=0x2b405b&color2=0x6b8ab6"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/MPWaL-B1tl4&hl=en_US&fs=1&color1=0x2b405b&color2=0x6b8ab6" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="325" height="244"></embed></object><br /><br />It all makes sense now. They call him "Joe Dimaggio the squirrel" and they brought him to Target Field. <br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiNS4DrSE3Irdvyiq9H-2ydVOiGTpKA_t9zGt8l_qN97dPTJLbc3AL-EYlS0dtLitbye6Iu1h1lsnnh2eRrPIh8BSJKtMr3v3Z6R5h5ar9JvG8EnsyYyoqZOTWKoXl2Xm06czglkk9fpddD/s1600/dimagioosquirrel.jpg"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 172px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiNS4DrSE3Irdvyiq9H-2ydVOiGTpKA_t9zGt8l_qN97dPTJLbc3AL-EYlS0dtLitbye6Iu1h1lsnnh2eRrPIh8BSJKtMr3v3Z6R5h5ar9JvG8EnsyYyoqZOTWKoXl2Xm06czglkk9fpddD/s320/dimagioosquirrel.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5475504285609990066" /></a><br />Visual Approximation. (I never understood Marilyn Monroe's taste) <br /><br />They sent him out there for one reason, and one reason only. To take out our hot corner. <br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgZDrUbeVLRzAXGGrYxDqCzfXlXZIcOneuZQm7RCXwGZDfhs2ct6vjv1RAttZb0SlSBD0KOQXPkPtTMzPfXrU4TkGeEdJ71KxQhjUGg3-lVUII7X_JzOlu7YZ1yiDJt16FcKY6q0JARLkXl/s1600/nomnomnomnom.jpg"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 301px; height: 225px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgZDrUbeVLRzAXGGrYxDqCzfXlXZIcOneuZQm7RCXwGZDfhs2ct6vjv1RAttZb0SlSBD0KOQXPkPtTMzPfXrU4TkGeEdJ71KxQhjUGg3-lVUII7X_JzOlu7YZ1yiDJt16FcKY6q0JARLkXl/s320/nomnomnomnom.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5475505044623392130" /></a><br /><br />Thankfully Brendan decided to show his quick reaction speed and avoided getting rabies and dying. They also realized taking him out would actually be doing us a favor. <br /><br />Next time, Joey D The Bushy Tailed Bronx Nommer. <br /><br /><br />side note: I am aware you are near tears at the beauty of my photoshop skills. So am I, I amaze myself. And I feel bad for ripping Joe Dimaggio's head and putting it on a squirrel. Just a tiny bit though.Karleehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00852949713984615780noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8570273292901105071.post-13065529243340013352010-05-18T01:18:00.004-05:002010-05-18T01:42:24.088-05:00OH HAI, I have internet again.Wowwwwwwwwwwwww, not blogging for like, a month pretty much put a damper on my life. I missed aimlessly typing away complete BS for you guys to read, truly. Did you miss me? I surely hope you did. So here is a "The Season So Far ROUND UP"<br /><br />- So, there is a falcon who sits on the right field foul pole. Everyone decided to name him Kirby. Come on people get creative, please. Before finding out it was an actual falcon I thought LaTroy HAWKins was pretty funny. Or Stephen HAWKing. But finding out that damn Kestrel was a freakin' hawk it crushed my witty bubble. I am going to be calling is Kessy the Kestrel. Or Karlee the Kestrel, I bet you money it's a girl. And Karlee is a wonderful, beautiful, elegant name.<br /><br />- Nick Punto decided to pick up a bat and swing it, and hit baseballs. And no, not where you think he hit them. Not flying out to left or a ground ball to second base. Oh no, he hits them and gets on base. Gets runs. And Rbi's. His batting avg is currently .261 and hitting .333 / .783 at home. (avg and ops)<br /><br />- Justin Morneau is a beast. <br /><br />- We won a game at Yankee Stadium, that is a big deal. Massive. I really hope they means the 'curse' is over. <br /><br />- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f2rgCezfB-k watch that. It is all the hilarious. <br /><br />- I still don't like Jose Mijares. And I would like to know why he got sent back up. Seriously, can someone tell me a valid reason why he is back up? <br /><br />Okay kids, I will post more often. I missed you <3<br /><br /><br />ps: If you want to listen to some hot jamz, let me suggest you a song or six<br /><br />I Feel Better by Hot Chip<br /><br />Brothers by The Black Keys<br /><br />Home by Edward Sharpe And The Magnetic Zeroes <br /><br />Bulletproof by La Roux<br /><br />Horchata by Vampire Weekend<br /><br />So Far Around the Bend by The NationalKarleehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00852949713984615780noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8570273292901105071.post-23727964014834869572010-04-14T19:26:00.002-05:002010-04-14T19:29:53.232-05:00LOLTwin, week one.I have decided I will be making LOLTwins once a week. Or try to at least for your viewing pleasure.<br /><br /><br />Here is this weeks:<br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjf3hHu-h93Gxkw96Gm79m2zIO-HmSp40eHExZzsk3hTrG0Sjd9zDcSm_BtGSzom8mt7aGlfqQab2wGirGWSKBWu2RHNl1C9tK_-jjPtDoaWApfTz7UDyiaFMU4pqbN-EcjJMNbk1e9J-91/s1600/puntobackride"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 274px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjf3hHu-h93Gxkw96Gm79m2zIO-HmSp40eHExZzsk3hTrG0Sjd9zDcSm_BtGSzom8mt7aGlfqQab2wGirGWSKBWu2RHNl1C9tK_-jjPtDoaWApfTz7UDyiaFMU4pqbN-EcjJMNbk1e9J-91/s320/puntobackride" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5460154745847659858" /></a><br /><br />Kar out.Karleehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00852949713984615780noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8570273292901105071.post-63175527136971209902010-04-14T11:15:00.003-05:002010-04-14T11:43:31.384-05:00Home Opener, Broken Belts, And a Blushing 20-something.Hi everyone! I am alive, I haven't updated since the Twins have been in town. And no I wasn't out stalking them. (Shocked? Me too, actually) I was working the streets. Wait, let me explain. I worked on a corner. Oh...let's just start over. I am a Target Brand Ambassador. I am one of those crazy kids passing out free stuff, like hats, sunglasses, spray-on sun screen, snacks, ponchos and sometimes hugs. <br /><br /> I sadly couldn't make it to the game but I was lurking about the whole time, going to bars and such and frolicking about the plaza. But like it was meant to be, I saw Punto slide into second breaking his belt then rip the belt off of his body on a big screen TV. It takes a lot to make me speechless but by golly that made me shut up and turn many different shades of red. <br /> From what I saw we looked strong, and the Red Sox looked like a bunch of those birds that stick their head in the sand? Their name is escaping me at the moment, but you all are more than likely smarter than I so you know what bird I am talking about. <br /><br />Hi, I'm Karlee. I like baseball, and I am disgustingly excited for this year. I think we have what it takes and then some. Rauch is a monster, who is a dominating force to be reckoned with. Our #8 hitter is blasting bombs out of the stadium and Nick Punto is producing rbi's. And we have a "Tori Hunter, the media side" kinda guy on our team to give us our 'bad-boy-think-before-I-speak' edge. <br /> Who is that you ask? Silly Orlando Hudson and his accusations that the likes of Jermaine Dye and Gary Sheffield aren't currently playing for any MLB team because they are black. Well guess what Orlando? I can't play baseball because I'm a female. How do you think I feel? (sarcasm alert) Ever consider they are old and there are a bunch of new young up and coming stars? How do you think Dougie Baseball and Joe Crede feel? (non-sarcasm alert, well...maybe a bit for Dougie)<br /><br />I can go on a tangent about how MLB is sexist and won't let short, white, chubby, and clumsy white girls play baseball. But I won't because it doesn't matter. And I'm a realist, I am not crazy. And I don't want to sound loony, kind of like O-Hud does. But I love the crazy, I embrace it. <br /><br />*This is my 200th post so I will now post my favorite Nick Punto picture I took.<br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg8_8HmvPPzenj-3Wy8sAWIGXNQysEcsclAtgTNOGiDWpmARGMZlGJZjNmjrtsEdL6SA9oW00bzRm1nR5h3kY6qdNBrfBGr8dv95yMan9sE2mh2Ncy0JV5B7zNo4pYvCTPZvTUR3C36e4DI/s1600/hehehehehe"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 256px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg8_8HmvPPzenj-3Wy8sAWIGXNQysEcsclAtgTNOGiDWpmARGMZlGJZjNmjrtsEdL6SA9oW00bzRm1nR5h3kY6qdNBrfBGr8dv95yMan9sE2mh2Ncy0JV5B7zNo4pYvCTPZvTUR3C36e4DI/s320/hehehehehe" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5460034198623713474" /></a><br />Oh yes.Karleehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00852949713984615780noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8570273292901105071.post-50684168397006549042010-04-07T20:38:00.007-05:002010-04-07T21:43:25.989-05:00Live From The Capital of Snuggie Cults!Hi all this will be my first live blog of this year. Oh, aren't you thrilled? <br /><br />Pre Game: Last night as we all know, we won. And also something else happened. The fans of the Angels showed us that the legalization of medical marijuana is still in full effect. Everyone in that stadium has cataracts. <br /><br />Uh, this new Meteorologist on FSN makes me want to club seals. No not really, that is mean. I guess I should of said something along the lines of "makes me want to club him" ahhh thats better. Peta, hold down your pokey sticks.<br /><br />Top of the first:<br /><br />- ground ball outs make me sad. at least fly balls take longer. Sigh.<br />- Wow, ground ball outs 1-2-3. Let's hope the whole game isn't like this. Innings like that make my creativity go away.<br /><br />Bottom of the first:<br /><br />- Bert, you silly man. California math, just say you can't count. <br />- Yep. You guessed it. 1-2-3 ground outs.<br /><br />Top of the second<br />-Gotta love it when you reach to first on a strike out. I bet Nick Punto wishes for those every day. <br />- Oh, Thome. Last time I checked you are supposed to hit home runs. Okay, I'll settle down. Next time.<br />- DELMON. Your lean cusine is ready DELMON. <br />- Oh, well I guess you weren't hungry enough to come 'home' and eat.<br /><br />--sorry to cut this short but I need to start getting ready to go to bed :( getting my wisdom teeth taken out. Boo. GO TWINS!Karleehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00852949713984615780noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8570273292901105071.post-89684709759831331102010-04-06T13:39:00.002-05:002010-04-06T14:24:55.736-05:00So far so good....well for the most part.<br /><br />Last nights game left me with a good feeling, but there was already some sort of worry. We all know I am a worry wart though.<br /><br /><br />Positive:<br /><br />The Bullpen was fantastic, sans Mijares. But he was too busy having blurry vision and being scared that Young might punch him. I was very shocked with Jesse Crain, though. For some reason I have it embedded in my brain that he will do something that will more than likely piss me off. Not saying that he will be perfect the whole season but if last night was any inclination of how he is going to be, well that makes me one happy baseball fan.<br /><br />The Delmon Young project is finally working. He is fast, his lack of leg kick has surely helped his batting swing and it seems like he finally has that aura of "I'm comfortable" that it seemed like he hasn't had since coming to the Twins<br /><br /><br />Negative:<br /><br />Joe Mauer kind of....yeah. Let's just say he made it clear that he isn't perfect. But I shall let this one pass, this time. Also Denard Span wasn't the best last night but hey, some of the other guys some-what picked up the slack.<br /><br />Excuse me where did the clutch two out hits go? Usually we are pretty good when we have men on base in scoring position. I think that is the most irritating thing in baseball for me. It's the whole fact that you can score and you are so close and you have chances and you blow them. <br />I am more okay with the pitcher K'ing the guys left and right. For me that just shows that the pitcher is good enough to shut down the opposing team. Now when you actually get on base and can't make things work, now that is when Karlee gets a little bit mad. <br /><br /><br />Ahhhhh, baseball how I missed thee. 161 (or maybe 162) games to go! Go Twins!Karleehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00852949713984615780noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8570273292901105071.post-81851130495880632492010-04-04T19:40:00.008-05:002010-04-04T22:46:35.134-05:00Opening Day!Yay, baseball is finally upon us! Celebration is in order. So, I will be writing my random thoughts whilst watching the Yanks and BoSox game tonight. I'll try my hardest (lies) to play nice.<br /><br /><br />- Jorge Posada looks like a malnourished Gus from Cinderella.<br /><br />- An open letter to Josh Beckett: Oh hai there just letting you know this isn't spring training. Stop pitching like it is. <3, Karlee.<br /><br />- Youkillis, you straight up freak me out. From the demonic facial hair to your super awkward batting stance. <br /><br />- Theo Epstein, you are a sexy man. I naturally like you because I shouldn't because I am a Twins fan. (FACT) I like men I shouldn't. Like Nick Punto.<br /><br />- Ever wonder where Luis RodrÃguez went? CC Sabathia ate him. When nature came-a callin', his 'remains' ended up in Cleveland.<br /><br />- Lance Bass is Derek Jeters doppelganger, and no that doesn't mean I find him attractive. <br />(Lance was totally my favorite, he was the shy one <3)<br /><br />- Seeing CC's (his bra size too, which is weird and kismet-y) leg move up that high makes me not believe in the theory of gravity. I know 'what goes up, must come down' that that thing shouldn't be able to 'go up' in the first place.<br /><br />- If Paul Revere didn't say "The British Are Coming!" and Papelbon said it instead the quote would of been "Ay...ay yo. All you mother *explicit* those damn brits are coming. They are suuuper pissed about that tea...even two years later! I MEAN COME ON. GET OVER IT."<br /><br />- I wish I could make fun of the New Era commercial with Evan Longoria in it. But I can't. I simply can't. I love that man.<br /><br />- Oh, this is weird I haven't brought up how much I loathe Nick Swisher. Hmmm. Interesting.<br /><br />- News Flash: The Umps are on the Yankees side, yet again. Am I shocked? Hecks to the naw.<br /><br />- Dude, Dr.Dre and LeBron James? Shut the front door. Compton is going to be very pissed off, Dr.Dre. Eazy-e more than likely thinks its unacceptable that you are a Red Sox fan and will pop a cap in your ass.<br /><br />- During the off-season I use CC's pants as my yacht cover.<br /><br />- Nick Swisher, your sideburns are ugly. Stop it. Just stop it. <br /><br />- Scott Schoeneweis I like your name. Schoeneneneneneneneneweis.<br /><br />- Double steal? You sneaky bastards, you Yankees. Okay ya know when I always say all they have is power? I lied. I totally lied. Remember that time when Nick Punto over ra---oh...wait I forgot I swore I would never bring that up (ScottyUlllgerrrwhyyyyy!)<br /><br />- Cheeseburger Cheeseburger beat out Pedroiahhhh tha bahhhstan destroyahh to the bag. Pedroia is full of anger salad. Cheeseburger Cheeseburger is full of ham that Mark Teixeira just fed him for a job well done.<br /><br />-Joe Girardi should of gone the "Miley Cyrus" way and got himself some invisaligns. You straight up look like a creeper.<br /><br />-Joe Morgan thinks it's faster to slide into first than running through it. Nick Punto, Joe Morgan...Joe Morgan, Nick Punto. Now that the introductions are out of the way, this is when you two become best of friends forever.Karleehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00852949713984615780noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8570273292901105071.post-49122886444705052602010-04-01T15:27:00.004-05:002010-04-01T17:09:58.908-05:00rain rain go away!So tomorrow will be the first game the MN Twins will play in their band-spankin-new baseball stadium. And in Minnesota fashion we will welcome them with inclement weather. I know, it sucks that it's going to rain but just think back about a month ago when we thought they'd be playing in 40 degree weather. Scared that it might snow. I'd take a nice thunderstorm in the 60s-70s any day. Well...except for tomorrow. I'd totally like it if it wouldn't rain.<br /><br /><br />Here is my only reason I am pro rain. Waterlogged baseball players.<br />Yes. Oh yes. <br /><br />But here is the one huge issue, when on home soil Nick Punto cannot get wet nor be fed Swedish Fish past the fourth inning. And with the weather maps I have been looking at, the rain will come down hard possibly around then. And you know what Nicky Punto does when he is bored? He snacks on gummied goods. And what does he turn into exactly if he gets rained on or snacks after the 4th inning? Nobody knows, but I have a good idea of what he'd look like:<br /><br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEianUb8MaCt-qeenvDdR-4Orwt1pdWfuG8txbMmPEAO67cegmUUqKZrIwlsyhBYAdkOiDcqL8b-MHNt2IQzPCx3GWlKdVjoD7WSPfVgpw0JQ2st15F6egaNalqrg5P8iIkrDo58lj9aThFC/s1600/31ec4f6c.jpg"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 302px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEianUb8MaCt-qeenvDdR-4Orwt1pdWfuG8txbMmPEAO67cegmUUqKZrIwlsyhBYAdkOiDcqL8b-MHNt2IQzPCx3GWlKdVjoD7WSPfVgpw0JQ2st15F6egaNalqrg5P8iIkrDo58lj9aThFC/s320/31ec4f6c.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5455292522769062242" /></a><br />The great long eared Jerboa. It's fast, it burrows (head first, naturally) and jumps crazy heights for being so tiny. Sounds familiar? Exactly.Karleehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00852949713984615780noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8570273292901105071.post-4257981635248393622010-03-22T23:01:00.004-05:002010-03-22T23:30:54.475-05:00Target Field is not picture perfect.I recently went down to Target Field to take a looksie, I wanted to take in every single aspect of the park, even reading the funny signs on the "trash only" trash cans. On my adventure I found something pretty interesting.<br /><br />The beautiful limestone, all the windows shiny clean. The plaza looks like a picture, no trash or cigarette butts anywhere. The pennants on the fence, and that massive bronze glove still shining in the spring sunshine. Everything is situated perfectly, just awaiting on thousands of fans to come and enjoy every minute of it. <br /><br />I go towards the new Twins shop and venture inside checking it out then I walk out, then I see the Stadium rules posted.<br /><br /><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj5adx6M2hmkO_0x8FFSr6y6KSTJnFsoJW78LquboGqAhHqkw9HkRW2lOEx6KYGRQAw6rXtmZGxM2flZOEWi-pzlifpzO3U7iU_k1Wex8ofFeeGtsZmAymeImxp3EmhU4YZIceYhSj3ec-2/s1600-h/mntwinshahahaha.png"><img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 237px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj5adx6M2hmkO_0x8FFSr6y6KSTJnFsoJW78LquboGqAhHqkw9HkRW2lOEx6KYGRQAw6rXtmZGxM2flZOEWi-pzlifpzO3U7iU_k1Wex8ofFeeGtsZmAymeImxp3EmhU4YZIceYhSj3ec-2/s320/mntwinshahahaha.png" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5451682035429667442" /></a><br /><br />uh oh.<br />Super bad typo. Unless there is a thing called "affectio" I think I'll call the stadium tomorrow and point that out. How embarrassing would that be? You're welcome, MN Twins for being an obsessive OCD type of person checking out EVERYTHING.Karleehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00852949713984615780noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8570273292901105071.post-7847133721531706742010-03-21T16:46:00.002-05:002010-03-21T16:49:32.223-05:00A weight has lifted off of meFINALLY.<br /><br /><br />Joe Mauer has signed an 8 year 184 million dollar contract extension. I shall celebrate and eat cookies and milk, since that is more than likely the way he will be celebrating too. Then getting his hair cut by his dad. But I will totally not let my father go near my hair.<br /><br /><br />HUZZAH, MN TWINS FANS. WE GOT EM!Karleehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00852949713984615780noreply@blogger.com2