booom shaka laka laka BOOM.

Warning: May contain a barrel of laughs. But might also contain a barrel of suck. Or a barrel of awesomeness.


Bottom of the 3rd.

-I hear Cowbell. I got a fevah..and the only prescription is for some rbis. Or maybe Scotty Bakes to throw more STRIKES.
-Ichiro Is a ninja. He stole 2nd and 3rd. He's such a ninja I bet he can steal 4th...yes. I said 4th.
-Bert yes..we know you had (main word) an amazing curveball. Now hes saying about different size balls..and seams..and some are bigger than the other...Oh, Bert.
-Castilla. A tarp was there. Uhm. Just to let you know.
-Watkings. Nice catch..And nice 4 fake throws. And falling on your ass. You made a Punto esq type play. Stop breaking my heart.
-We got out of the inning safe,huzzah huzzah huzzah!

Top of the 4th

-Bartlett. Lead off doubles make me feel fancy. I bet it makes you feel fancy too. Rawr.
-Bartlett, thanks for checking beltre into the dirt.
Taking hockey lessons from Mr.Canada, eh?
-Speaking of Mr.Canada. Hi. Your boom stick called, it misses you.
And Justin called back and said "Shhh..I like pop up's..the chicks dig it..."

Bottom of the 4th

-Yankees lost. And Red Sox lost to the devil rays (LOLLERCOASTER)
-Bakes. Three straight strike outs? NICE. Would it be too much of me to ask for a bakers dozen of strikes? I think so.

Top of the 5th

-Strike outs aren't "nice" when it's our players striking out.
-Ron DL do something nice.
-Bert said marny looks pretty. OoOoOoOoOoHhHhhhh..
-OH OH. SWEET BABY JESUS. First home run rly RONNIE?
THANKS <3
-Watkins first major league hit? WOAH. What's going on here?
-I feel some crazy shenanigans comming...

Bottom of the 5th
-WHAT..DICK..You don't have your US MAP on you. Now something crazy is going to go on....
woah..wait its the top of the 6th already? Was is that amazing I missed it?
Baker are you taking ninja mind lessons from Ichiro?

Top of the 6th
-B ROCK. NOES. YOU okay? OMG Punto is running for you. Run like the kitten you are. Hopefully b-rock didn't pull anything. Why must someone always end up getting hurt once we start doing okay?
-Morneau looks mad..had some nice words for the ump.(ps:got called out on strikes,ouch mor mor)
-Cuddy. Swing next time.

Bottom of the 6th
-Gardy, got thrown out? CUTE. Now ullger is running the team. Oh goodness. And Punto is at short. I told you I felt some crazy shenanigans coming..
-Now it's a tie game...scotty, oh..scotty.Ibanez you are all that is evil in the world...but Ibanez guitars are pretty sweet. But not baseball players named Ibanez

Top of the 7th
-Now all we need is Punto to have a home run, then this game can officially be named the WEIRDEST GAME EVER.
-1,2,3. yuck.

Bottom of the 7th
-twins, your defence makes my heart melt. In the good way. Yum.
-1 and oh to ichiro..1 and oh to ichiro...say it, it's fun. Slides off your tongue nicely...eh..suprise surprise, he hit the ball.
-two out. peeps on the corners. Lets do this bakes.
-Or not...Death Metal can do the job.
-And he did.

Top of the 8th
-Castilla. got some sharp shades on. And thanks for "spanking" a single down the middle.
-Punto. Remember, you have to make a home run to top the "awkwardly weird game sundae" with its awkward cherry?
-OR you can just do a bunt and get a double. That's also a very nice thing.
-Ohhh walking Mauer eh?
-AND the bases are full. AND we get a run in. AND the bases are full again. AND we are ahead. AND I'm happy.
-Stike out Morneau. Yeowza. I can feel that anguish and hate from here.
-Hai I'm Michael Cuddyer. And I swing at balls and miss. wassap?
-Hai I'm Rondell White. The bases are loaded what shall I do? *pause and watches* dribble it to first. side note: dribbling is in basketball. NOT baseball.

Bottom of the 8th
-DEATH METAL DEATH METAL oonst oonst...make them go "no boom"
-death metal moshes the eff out of the line drive ball. Getting out of the 8th safely.

Top of the 9th
-I had the great idea of making a "dick and bert" drinking game. I will be posting that soon. And my ideas for the game will probably get you drunk within the 3rd inning.
-Watkins u best bunt boi. Oh. buntfoul. Don't bunt on two strikes. But I bet Punto already told you that. And if you do? Naughty.
-Watkins. Double. Rawr.
-Punto you need some rbi's. You need to smell em'. It's been a while. Keep fouling the ball off until you find a nice ball. Or...yeah...*shrugs* *hums dont stop believing by journey*
-Remember the last time you walked Mauer? I remember.
-HAHA I TOLD YOU NOT TO WALK MAUER.
TORII MO EFFING I LIKE ME SOME RBIS GRAND SLAM!

Smell em'

*insert karlee dancing around house and her phone ringing off the hook, hearing the excitement from other loyal awesome twins fans*

Bottom of the 9th
Joe.Nathan. Nuff said.

Pre Game

6-1. Is there such thing as "happy salad' eh? Pulling A Blyleven?