Wednesday, March 5, 2008

Jeter, stop looking in the camera when you talk

It's like your speaking to ME and it creeps me out.


PRE GAME:
It's been quite some time since I've written when the game is going on, I'm actually quite excited. I am soooo going to be rusty, and probably not that hillarious so bare with me.
But this whole "lets talk to Jeter for 15 minutes" is not making me a happy girl.
gomez harris mauer morneau young buscher knott jones tolbert....thats a very awkward looking line up.


TOP OF THE FIRST:
-Hi Carlos Gomez, you have the same birthday as me AND born the same year. So you kinda have to be good if your born on that day. Sorry. Bunt. Out. Your fast but not FAST enough. strike one,Carlos.
-Hmmmm Brendan Harris...yeah they are going to lose defensively if he's 2nd base. Someone realizes this. And its a guy on espn. I feel as if I'm working for the man. OH, he got a single.
-Mauerrrrrr, wow he does NOT stop growing.Mauer HIT INTO A DOUBLE PLAY? NO WAY. THAT NEVER HAPPENS. Oh, wait. Thats sarcasm. He ALWAYS does. He hits into double plays as much as Punto tries to lay down a simple bunt.

BOTTOM OF THE FIRST:
-Slowey, oh Slowey. Sweet Slowey. Make Karlee happy.
-one out
-Oh you aren't happy with your bat Jeter? Wow, your such a diva.
-Wow, guess the bat worked, spanked it to middle center.
-if nick punto would of been at 2nd he could of hit the double play? REALLY espn guy? I LIKE YOU.
-Slowey good boy, making A-rod swing and miss <3 Please strike him out. 2-2. Or walk him. It was a tough at bat, so ya know. That's okay?
-Giambi got caught looking, thats what I like.

TOP OF THE SECOND
-Morneau.I miss your boom stick. I don't miss pop flys. And the espn guy just called him Mauer. LOL, cute.
-Delmon Young, sup guy? YEAH HOME RUN, TORII WHO? WHAT? WHAT?
-Busch Light, back to back homers? No? Maybe? Wow Giambi, you can jump? CRAZY.
-two out
-Knott out

BOTTOM OF THE SECOND
-Posada looks like a mouse.
-YOUNG don't scare me like that! But you caught it. But don't do that again.
-GOMEZ, oh gomez.
-one out some yank on second.
-it's tied now, GOMEZ YOU MESSED up TWICE, but I guess if Slowey were throwing strikes we wouldnt be worried about guys hitting into center.
-There ya go, second strike out.
-NICK would of caught that Harris. See people, we NEED Punto. Yeah he can't hit but we'd still be tied. Not behind by one. Yeah I'm going there, it's pre season I don't care. I love starting fights.
-Get Jeter out, NOW Slowey stop with these shenanigans, OR walk him.
-Rick anderson knock some sense into Slowey, see if Punto was playing he'd walk out, say something along the lines of "I rode paul Molitors daughters training bike, think of that" then skip off eating swedish fish.
-Gomez, throw to the cut off guy or even the catcher, not the backstop. Gomez thats strike three for you, YOU are fired!
-I like it when A-rod swings and misses, makes me a happy girl. SWUNG AND MISS,nice strike three sit down bitch.

TOP OF THE THIRD
-Uh. Don't show Santana in a twins uniform again, thanks. I'm aware he's gone.
-"hey guys this is turning into a roast" awww gardy, your so witty.
-Gomez, maybe hit the ball, and make up for your mistakes. Or get out again. Thats fine.
-wow, we're out already?

BOTTOM OF THE THIRD
-I'm feeling very rusty today. I'm not as witty as Gardy. Most of the time I'm not because he's just a hoot.
-Julio De Paula is pitching now. I don't know how that makes me feel.
-BALK? RLY? Mauer get out there and say something smart.
-One down,....you know the rest.
-Gomez did another crazy throw, but we got another out. two out.
-strike out,looking.

TOP OF THE FOUTH (1-4)
-JOBA the hut is pitching.
-Harris, lets see what you can do. Other than not catch balls that Nick Punto could have caught.
-dribbler to 2nd. 1 Out.
-Mauer. chopper to first. 2nd out.
-Morneau. Walked.
-Delmon, want to hit another home run?
-Sighs, 3rd out.

BOTTOM OF THE FOUTH (1-4)
-randy keasler eh? *sits and watches*
-One out, nice Keasy. I bet gardy calls you that.
-haha, Damon at the plate and Mauer catching? I'm having pepsi commerical flash backs.
-ground ball to 2nd, two down.
-HARRIS. Okay he should not be 2nd basemen. Please if you want to tell me that I'm crazy to think Nick Punto would be better, go on and tell me.
-Gomez actually caught the ball, 3 out.

TOP OF THE FIFTH(1-4)
-C'mon BUSCH LIGHT lets fire it up! Oh you fired it up alright with that fancy single.
-Knott you better not strike out, ha. Get it. Yeah.
-WOW, he loves fouling off balls a lot.Awww Knott got caught looking, sad.
-Giambi looks like jabba the hut. Scary.
-Garret Jones two run HOME RUN! You hit that HARD. he hit that thing out of the park.
-Tolbert got hit on the ankle :( Poor thing that hit him straight in the kisser, if your kisser was your ankle.

BOTTOM OF THE FIFTH (3-4)
-Gomez caught another ball, *golf clap* good boy. One out.
-Casilla, you are quite good at short stop. Dang, you surprised me there. You should be at short stop not second. Two out.
-Keasler your good, you keep the ball down. I enjoy it.

TOP OF THE SIXTH (3-4)
-c'mon Mauer Pauer. Hit to the left center field for a two bagger. THANK YOU.
-Morneau, how about you show people how well you can hit, stop teasing us.
-Morales came in as a pinch runner, then failed, so did morneau. two out.
-Delmon young with a single. He makes me very happy.
-Oh, stranded a guy on base? Wow, shocking.

BOTTOM OF THE SIXTH (3-4)
-Awww,Hi Justin Morneau. Let's have a chat.
-Justin addmits he didnt do good today, how down to earth and canadian of you, Morney.
-Im going to say it one more time. If Punto was out there. we'd have two double plays by now. But wow, look. We have 0.
-WOAH, thats reyes? He doesn't look like a floater anymore. Yikes, I'm harsh.
-Oh yeah, Casilla thanks for making a double play.


TOP OF THE SEVENTH (4-4)
-the ball game is tied, sorry it's hard to type when I'm a giggly baseball-y mess.
-you got the hang of this, one two three. next inning.

BOTTOM OF THE SEVENTH (4-4)
-DEATH METAL IS PITCHING. I missed his crazyness, nice simple one two three inning.Tasty.

TOP OF THE EIGHTH (4-4)
-morales takes a walk.
-okay is it "lets hit twins ball players" day?
-bases loaded, one out. ahhh, very excite!
-fair ball down the line two rbi double!
-All these new guys are making the game today, and the regulars haven't done anything. It's kind of weird...and I feel like I'm cheating on the regulars with the new guys.
-7-4 now. This makes me feel good about our team. I was so worried about all the new guys and how everyone says we are rebuilding. I think we already re built.

BOTTOM OF THE EIGHTH (7-4)
-I officially dont know who anyone is on the field. Haha. Well I do but you get what I mean.
-Nice one two three inning. yahtzee.

TOP OF THE NINTH (7-4)
-Sorry, I had to go to the bathroom. Bet you wanted to know that.
-Morales on first, two out and someone I have no clue hitting. I'm such a good blogger. Really.
-Ahhh,the guy i have no clue hitting struck out.

BOTTOM OF THE NINTH (7-4)
-Sosa is pitching. Not Sammy silly goose.
-Gomez snatching a fly ball, one out.
-Girls who like the yankees shouldnt drink in the afternoon. Because Karlee doesn't like hearing you drunkenly slur/yell "LETHH GO YANKEEZ" your going to lose, have that bitter taste in your mouth, thats the taste of LOSS.
-I spoke too soon, yankee home run. Now drunken guys and girls are chanting lets go yankees.
-Base hit? Tying run to the plate? HEY GARDY, new pitcher! Skipper Karlee, that has a nice ring to it.
-3-2 two out...*drum roll* STRIKE three called!

That means we won ya'll!


Verdict: New guys +1
Regulars -1
that means it all equals to 0.
We're even. just like our wins a loses. 3-3.

Side notes: Harris I don't know about you. Your like Punto but a bit better hitting, but way worse with defense. Id rather have defence we already have guys who produce big hits.
(IE: morneau, mauer,cuddyer,young..well they SHOULD atleast)

All in all seeing all these "youngsters" against the big bad yankees. And us kicking some booty during the end there really gives me hope.

PS: ESPN needs to stop humping the yankees. They did not pay attention to the game. They called morneau mauer and called morales mauer. Thats a tounge twister right there. Jeez.

2 comments:

L said...

Yeah the mixing up of names was bad. I thought it was funny when they would go "OH no! We're roasting Gardy again!"

Don't roast Gardy. He'll roast you.

Karleeee said...

Espn announcers should be afraid of Gardy.
He looks all puffy,santa-like.
But he will wreck you.

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